FANDOM


Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie
Some Kind Of Lesbian Zombie
Season
Episode
7
Airdate
November 14, 2013
Ratings
Running time
{{{length}}}
Production code
{{{pc}}}
Flashback
{{{flashback}}}
Flash-forward
{{{flash-forward}}}
Flash sideways
{{{flash-sideways}}}
Ratings
Written by
Jim Patterson, Steve Tompkins, Jeff Lowell (story) Don Reo, Matt Ross, Matt Searle (teleplay)
Directed by
Also Starring
{{{alsostarring}}}
Guest Starring
Courtney Thorne-Smith - Lyndsey McElroy
Spencer Locke - Jill
Madison Dylan - Laurie
Kim Shaw - Maria
Jeff Probst - Himself
Special Guest Star(s)
{{{specialguests}}}
Co-Starring
Uncredited
Previous Episode
{{{Previous}}}
Next Episode
{{{Next}}}
Archive footage
{{{archive}}}

Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie is the 7th episode of Season 11. It aired on November 14, 2013.

Summary

Walden and Alan find themselves on dates with two ideal women until Lyndsey's jealousy throws a wrench in their evening.

Plot

Walden, Jenny and Alan are at Pavlov's and are ogling a hot bartender, until Jenny reveals that she already slept with her. Alan begins to ask Jenny about how she first realised that she was gay. Jenny begins to recount her first lesbian experience.

She vividly describes her encounter, leaving Alan and Walden salivating, until she reveals that it was just a story. Alan and Walden then begin to argue about who should ask a hot girl out. When they finally decide, they find the girl, actually a lesbian, already leaving with Jenny.

Two cute girls Laurie and Jill enter the bar and sit beside the duo. Laurie is dumb/embarrassing (ala Alan) and Jill is the intellectual one. Walden and Jill end up apologising for their respective friends and hit it off and score dates. The next day Lyndsey arrives, just before they're leaving for their dates, putting Alan in an awkward situation when he doesn't know how to tell Lyndsey he has a date. Lyndsey is originally fine with it, but later drunkenly calls him on the phone just as Alan is about to have sex with Laurie when the girls come over for dinner that night.

He interrupts Walden's attempts to sleep with Jill and reasons that it is only fair he has sex with Laurie since Lyndsey has a boyfriend and is using him in the same way. Just as Alan goes back downstairs, Lyndsey shows up at the door and suggests they have sex.

Laurie emerges from Alan's room and the girls trade insults before Lyndsey throws up on Walden's rug. Alan goes to Lyndsey's house to apologize, but also to clarify that he is done being used by her while she is with Larry, and says goodbye to Lyndsey before Lyndsey decides that she wants Alan, and is going to break up with Larry.

They get back together, but while in bed, decide that Larry is missing from the relationship and opt to give it another shot. Walden goes to Jill's apartment to get back together, but Jill is already being entertained by Jeff Probst, who had earlier been cooking on the beach, and Walden is once more left alone as they close the door on him.

Cast

Title quotation from

Walden, to Jenny, referring to her sex life and apparent ability to turn straight women into lesbians.

Guest Starring

  • Kim Shaw as Maria
  • Jeff Probst as Himself

Quotes

  • Walden: She’s cute.
    Alan: She is.
    Jenny: She’s sucks in bed. And not in a good way.
    Walden: I didn’t know she was gay.
    Jenny: Neither did she till last Thursday.
    Walden: You’re like some kind of lesbian zombie, infecting the women of Malibu.
    Jenny: (doing a zombie impression) Must have vagina!
  • Walden: Do you think all women are potential lesbians?
    Alan: After 30 years of masturbation, I'd say yes!
  • Alan: That’s not the girl you picked up from the bar last night.
    Jenny: No, that’s the girl who delivered the pizza to me and the girl I picked up at the bar last night.
    Walden: I hope you gave her a good tip.
    Jenny: Nah, she didn’t come in 30 minutes or less.
  • Walden: Do what every little boy in America wants to do—bang the little mermaid.

Trivia

  • This is the first episode to feature Amber Tamblyn as a series regular.
Two and a Half Men Episodes
Season 1
PilotBig Flappy BastardsGo East On Sunset Until You Reach The Gates Of HellIf I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going To Take A NapThe Last Thing You Want To Do Is Wind Up With A HumpDid You Check With The Captain Of The Flying Monkeys?If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually FakeTwenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without A Snoot-fulPhase One, CompleteMerry ThanksgivingAlan Harper, Frontier ChiropractorCamel Filters And PheromonesSarah Like Puny AlanI Can't Afford HyenasRound One To The Hot Crazy ChickThat Was Saliva, AlanAte The Hamburgers, Wearing The HatsAn Old Flame With A New WickI Remember The Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember YouHey, I Can Pee Outside In The DarkNo Sniffing, No WowingMy Doctor Has A Cow PuppetJust Like BuffaloCan You Feel My Finger?
Season 2
Back Off, Mary PoppinsEnjoy Those Garlic BallsA Bag Full of JaweaGo Get Mommy's BraBad News from the ClinicThe Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal VigilanceA Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in FontanaFrankenstein and the Horny VillagersYes, MonsignorThe Salmon Under My SweaterLast Chance to See Those TattoosA Lungful of AlanZejdz z Moich Wlosów a.k.a. Get Off My HairThose Big Pink Things With CoconutsSmell the Umbrella StandCan You Eat Human Flesh With Wooden Teeth?Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!It Was Mame, MomA Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping NoiseI Always Wanted a Shaved MonkeyA Sympathetic Crotch to Cry OnThat Old Hose Bag Is My MotherSquab, Squab, Squab, Squab, SquabDoes This Smell Funny to You?
Season 3
Weekend in Bangkok with Two Olympic GymnastsPrincipal Gallagher's Lesbian LoverCarpet Burns and a Bite MarkYour Dismissive Attitude Toward BoobsWe Called It Mr. PinkyHi, Mr. Horned OneSleep Tight, Puddin' PopThat Voodoo That I Do DoMadame and Her Special FriendSomething Salted and TwistedSanta's Village of the DamnedThat Special TugHumiliation is a Visual MediumLove Isn't Blind, It's RetardedMy Tongue Is MeatErgo, The Booty CallThe Unfortunate Little SchnauserThe Spit-Covered CobblerGolly Moses, She's a MuffinAlways a Bridesmaid, Never a BurroAnd the Plot MoistensJust Once With Aunt SophieArguments for the QuickieThat Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
Season 4
Working for CaligulaWho's Vod Kanockers?The Sea is a Harsh MistressA Pot Smoking MonkeyA Live Woman of Proven FertilityApologies for the FrivolityRepeated Blows to His Unformed HeadRelease the DogsCorey's Been Dead for an HourKissing Abraham LincolnWalnuts and DemerolCastrating Sheep in MontanaDon't Worry, Speed RacerThat's Summer Sausage, Not SalamiMy Damn StalkerYoung People Have Phlegm TooI Merely Slept with a CommieIt Never Rains in HootervilleSmooth as a Ken DollAunt Myra Doesn't Pee a LotTucked, Taped and GorgeousMr. McGlue's FeedbagAnteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin'Prostitutes and Gelato
Season 5
Large Birds, Spiders and MomMedia Room Slash DungeonDum Diddy Dum Diddy DooCity of Great RacksPutting Swim Fins on a CatHelp Daddy Find His ToenailThe Leather Gear Is in the Guest RoomIs There a Mrs. Waffles?Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar LidsKinda Like NecrophiliaMeander to Your DanderA Little Clammy and None Too FreshThe Soil is MoistWinky-Dink TimeRough Night in Hump JunctionLook at Me, Mommy, I'm PrettyFish in a DrawerIf My Hole Could TalkWaiting for the Right Snapper
Season 6
Taterhead is Our Love ChildPie Hole, HerbDamn You, Eggs BenedictThe Flavin' and the Mavin'A Jock Strap In HellIt's Always Nazi WeekBest H.O. Money Can BuyPinocchio's MouthThe Mooch At The BooHe Smelled The Ham, He Got ExcitedThe Devil's LubeThank God for ScoliosisI Think You Offended DonDavid Copperfield Slipped Me a RoofieI'd Like to Start with the CatShe'll Still Be Dead at HalftimeThe 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?My Son's Enormous HeadThe Two Finger RuleHello, I am Alan CousteauAbove Exalted CyclopsSir Lancelot's Litter BoxGood Morning, Mrs. ButterworthBaseball Was Better With Steroids
Season 7
818-jklpuzoWhipped Unto The Third GenerationMmm, fish. Yum.Laxative Tester, Horse InseminatorFor The Sake of The ChildGive Me Your ThumbUntainted by FilthGorp. Fnark. Schmegle.Captain Terry's Spray-On HairThat's Why They Call It "Ball Room"Warning, It's DirtyFart Jokes, Pie and CelesteYay, No Polyps!Crude and Uncalled ForAye, Aye, Captain DoucheTinkle Like a PrincessI Found Your MoustacheIxnay On The Oggie DayKeith Moon Is Vomiting In His GraveI Called Him MagooGumby with a PokeyThis Is Not Gonna End Well
Season 8
Three Girls and a Guy Named BudA Bottle of Wine and a JackhammerA Pudding-Filled CactusHookers, Hookers, HookersThe Immortal Mr. Billy JoelTwanging Your Magic ClangerThe Crazy Bitch GazetteSpringtime on a StickA Good Time in Central AfricaOw, Ow, Don't StopDead from the Waist DownChocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's DeadSkunk, Dog Crap and KetchupLookin' for Japanese SubsThree Hookers and a Philly CheesesteakThat Darn Priest
Season 9
Nice to Meet You, Walden SchmidtPeople Who Love PeepholesBig Girls Don't Throw FoodNine Magic FingersA Giant Cat Holding a ChurroThe Squat and the HoverThose Fancy Japanese ToiletsThank You For The IntercourseFrodo's HeadshotsA Fishbowl Full of Glass EyesWhat A Lovely Landing StripOne False Move, Zimbabwe!Slowly and In A Circular FashionA Possum on ChemoThe Duchess of Dull-in-SackSips, Sonnets and SodomyNot In My Mouth!The War Against GingivitisPalmdale, EchGrandma's PieMr. Hose Says "Yes"Why We Gave Up WomenThe Straw In My Donut HoleOh Look! Al-Qaeda!
Season 10
I Changed My Mind About the MilkA Big Bag of DogFour Balls, Two Bats and One MittYou Do Know What The Lollipop Is ForThat's Not What They Call It In AmsterdamFerrets, Attack!Avoid The Chinese MustardSomething My Gynecologist SaidI Scream When I PeeOne Nut JohnsonGive Santa a Tail-HoleWelcome to AlancrestGrab A Feather And Get In LineRun, Steven Staven! Run!Paint It, Pierce It or Plug ItAdvantage: Fat, Flying BabyThrogwarten Middle School MysteriesThe 9:04 From PembertonBig Episode. Someone Stole A SpoonBazinga! That's From a TV ShowAnother Night With Neil DiamondMy Bodacious VidaliaCows, Prepare to be Tipped
Season 11
NangnangnangnangI Think I Banged Lucille BallThis Unblessed BiscuitClank, Clank, Drunken SkankAlan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003Justice in Star-Spangled Hot PantsSome Kind of Lesbian ZombieMr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.Numero Uno Accidente LawyerOn Vodka, on Soda, on Blender, on Mixer!Tazed In The Lady NutsBaseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.Bite Me, Supreme CourtThree Fingers of Crème de MentheCab Fare and a Bottle of PenicillinHow to Get Rid of Alan HarperWelcome Home, JakeWest Side StoryLan Mao Shi Zai Wuding ShangLotta Delis in Little ArmeniaDial 1-900-Mix-A-LotOh, Wald-e, Good Times Ahead
Season 12
The Ol' Mexican SpinachA Chic Bar in IbizaGlamping in a YurtThirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-EightOontz, Oontz, OontzAlan Shot a Little GirlSex With an Animated Ed AsnerFamily, Bublé, Deep-Fried TurkeyBouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, LyndseyHere I Come, Pants!For Whom the Booty CallsA Beer-Battered Rip-OffBoompa Loved His HookersDon't Give a Monkey a GunOf Course He's Dead

Ad blocker interference detected!


Wikia is a free-to-use site that makes money from advertising. We have a modified experience for viewers using ad blockers

Wikia is not accessible if you’ve made further modifications. Remove the custom ad blocker rule(s) and the page will load as expected.